New Year, Same Me (and I don't feel bad about it)

Photo by Ryan Kell

Happy New Year!

2020 is here and everyone is talking about New Year’s resolutions. And I think that is total BS. And I’m going to tell you why.

Disclaimer: If you disagree with anything that I say, please don’t think I’m attacking you. Things that may work for you may not work for me and vice versa. I’m just sharing my thoughts and opinions and I am open to discussions!

Why do people feel like they need to totally reinvent themselves on January 1st? Lose weight, travel more, become adventurous, meditate, etc. WHY?

What about the start of a new year makes people say, “You know what? Last year and the years before I was total shit, but this year I’m going to finally do XYZ so I can be the best version of myself that I can be.”

The pressure from society to pick a resolution and change something about yourself is REAL, and I’ve fallen victim to it plenty of times in the past.

For example.

I’ve never been the type of person to meditate, or write in a daily journal, or read self-help books. I hear so many women talk about the importance of using meditation and journaling as self care. The idea of writing down thoughts and being quiet and clearing your mind never sounded like something I would get much out of. But I felt shame. I felt shame because all of these strong women on the internet preached about how meditation and reflection is the key to a healthy mindset. In thinking about myself, if I’ve never done these things, how could I claim to be centered, well-rounded, and at peace with my inner self? So I made a New Year’s resolution to try it. And I hated it. All of it. Sure there are things in life that we try and don’t enjoy and just move on from there, but why did I feel so bad about this one?

You see, I’m kind of all over the place. I wouldn’t say I’m disorganized, but I don’t make lists (unless it’s for grocery shopping) and I’ve never written down goals. I have everything up in my brain just floating around like an astronaut in outer space. This is how I function, and this is how I’ve always functioned and it works for me. I keep up with deadlines and appointments and social functions and I smash through goals and have currently reached a point in my career that I never dreamed I could do. I’ve done all of this without meditation or journaling or self-help, so why did I feel like I had to introduce something new into my world just to be successful? Again, NO SHADE to those who do all of these things and I’m sure that they are wonderful tools, but they just weren’t for me.

My point is, if you are content and happy and thriving and living your best life (while not causing harm to others), why would you let society tell you that you had to change something about yourself in order to be a better person? Sure, I could probably lose 5-10 pounds, but I exercise regularly and I make healthy food choices, with the occasional slice of pizza thrown in there for good measure. So why change because the calendar strikes January 1st?

This year, and every year from here on out, I’m skipping the resolutions. What I did, however, is choose a word. A word to define how I will look at the year ahead. My word is intentional. I’ve made reference to this word in the 2020 episode of the When’s Food podcast.

Two main reasons why I’ve chosen intentional as my word of the year: When I started blogging almost seven years ago, I would jump at literally every opportunity that came my way: every meetup, party, networking event, takeover, etc. because I felt like I needed to be everywhere all at once. I found that I burnt out quickly and I burnt out hard. That was something I knew right away wasn’t good for myself and my mental health. Fast forward to last year when I realized that one of my passion projects was not working out as I’d hoped. Not wanting to give up on it altogether, I decided that I needed to tweak how I was running things so that I wasn’t wasting my time, energy, and money on something that wasn’t going to be appreciated or utilized.

Because of these reasons, I’ve decided that every decision, or at least most decisions, that I make in 2020 will be intentional. If there’s no purpose or good reason for why I should do something, then why do it? It sounds much more simple than it actually is, coming from a person who likes to do a million things, partially because of FOMO. This word will be living in the front of my brain, and I’m excited to revisit this at the end of the year to see just how things have worked out.

So at the end of the day (and the beginning of a new decade) it’s a new year and the same (intentional) me, and I don’t feel bad about it.

Neither should you.